It's the fundamental paradox. You want X and to avoid Y, except you need Y to get X. Failure to resolve this paradox can be seen with a simple example. Have you ever known someone who is so obsessed with the technicalities of language that it makes it difficult for them to express themselves? It's the feeling of wanting to FEEL correct over BEING correct. Failure to resolve this paradox is seen when a person wants their particular method to be correct more than they want to do the correct thing.
It's the basic meaning behind the image of Yamataka, the indestructible destroyer of death.
Fuck, I love that image.
People who have met with this paradox without resolving it speak of a place within themselves that they can never go. A place that would destroy them if they went (into it, explored it, opened it up, whatever). And uh, it would. But it wouldn't destroy them. It doesn't make sense until you explore that place and it's not the kind of decision you can really make just sitting on the couch or whatever. It's an experience. You can reach that place a number of ways, including meditation- but it's not a choice one can make without significant risk. Actually, if you don't see the risk, then you're a total fucking idiot and you're probably going to die.
Bravery is being scared and doing it anyway. You've got to realize what you've got to lose... and then you've got to do it because what it represents is worth more than mere survival.
You've got to see something worthwhile beyond death. Something beyond your own life that is worth working towards.
That's the greatest thing in the world. It's also the most terrible.
So uh... let's boogy.
Motherfucker. Check it.
http://www.yamantaka.org/component/content/article/1-vajrabhairava-yamantaka-an-introduction.html
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