cruel

I don't seek escape. I've not once asked for another journey. Not once have I begged to be other than where I am. Not once. I often fold under the weight but it is a burden I carry eagerly.

I'd give my life for beauty. It is the only thing that sustains me. Food is bland in comparison and I derive all my sustenance from the sustained notes of heaven. That is why I have such a beast within me. It's driven not by the mechanisms of man but of heaven. It is the savage nature of the divine due to it's distance from man. It is, in essence, the nature of man. I AM fringe. I AM humanity. I exist as all men are born to serve and I suffer for my own ignorance. Not once have I asked for otherwise.

Often throughout my life I've been given the choice for a life other than where I am. I've often asked myself if I'd dedicate to this struggle. Again, not once have I chosen otherwise. I've had twenty years to think about the consequences. It's strange to see into the heart of man; to see it's twisting and beating. To look, sometimes coldly, into the soul and know it's bearing. To know it's function and method. To smell it and become brothers to the brother. To saddle up to the godhead and be it's messenger. It's a terrible burden.