I'm paraphrasing, but Grant Venerable, the name of greatness if ever there was one, once said that the measure of a man's excellence was his ability to confront paradox. When you look for solace and find bewilderment- to get that real sense of what's up, to get a solid dose of that wretchedness.
I've got a deep relationship with that feeling. One moment, under the weight of being self-critical to the point of manic depression, to becoming that weight. That unbelievable, undefinable weight. It's the simultaneous feeling of being a pimple and the greasy preteen squeezing it. The zip-pop-wow of being transported between that flimsy, wretched thing to that incalculably solid feeling.
A titan amongst men. That indistinguishable "it." Beyond being the product of the universe, a thing to be acted upon; not even relating to the body. You are the strength that acts upon the body. Not the motion itself, but the motion of motion. The wetness of water. The strength in strength. Action of action.
Beyond even that. Yes, I've got a deep relationship with that feeling.
Magnum Opus
The great work.
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